{Virtual Coffee}

Thursday, January 29, 2015

Hey there.
Good morning to you + Happy Thursday.
This morning is my early morning, one of the days that my "early to rise"  mission worked.
Hooray for me!
I am batting about every other day so far, not including weekends, and my goal is to eventually wake up early every morning Monday-Friday.
And my ultimate goal is for it to become completely natural.... and for me to LOVE it, every day.
I'm not there yet... but it's a good goal to have.
I love getting the day started slowly, quietly, alone... And in order for those things to happen I need
to be up a minimum of one hour before the kids are up.
Preferably an hour and a half before the kids are awake, really.
I will get there one day, I am not giving up on my dream of becoming an early riser! 

But anyway.
I am up early and having my morning on the couch under a quilt, which is probably the best place
to have it, besides somewhere with friends.
When I am up before everyone else the couch is where I almost always have my coffee, sometimes my
office in warmer weather but in the Winter it's pretty cold in the mornings in there.
How about you? Couch? Kitchen table? Office?
One of the things I really miss since I started working is meeting friends for coffee or having them
come over in the nice weather and sit on the patio and have coffee.
s  i  g  h. 

So... if you were really over chatting with me over coffee this morning we would have to talk about my bright white fancy new living room.
Okay, so it's not fancy at all... but it is bright white.
We painted it white about two weeks ago and man, it is WHITE.
The change is really growing on me though and it just make the space look bigger, more open
and cleaner.
I know that's actually because it is cleaner though, too... there has been a lot of purging and organizing going on here as well.
I am really loving not only the white, but just the act of slowly putting things back up/out and knowing that it's okay to not put everything back out and to get rid of things or put them in storage for now.
It's a process and the hardest part about painting a room to me is that I then want everything new
in the room.
Couches, rugs, curtains, lamps! All the furniture needs a fresh coat of paint!
Everything needs to be new!

{These are just quick pictures I snapped with my iphone, I will take better pictures and share the whole room soon! }

After about two weeks back in school now, after the longest Christmas break in the history of man,
I think we are finally getting back into a routine around here... Finally.
Things are more normal now-- even though Wyatt has had not one, but two rounds of pink eye,
and with all of the sickness going around I am just holding my breath until Spring.
I need to completely stop reading/watching the news because all the sickness and flu and crazy
things happening gives me way too much anxiety.
Around here we have been daydreaming about a Summer vacation and Spring plans and wishing
it was Soccer season already, while still trying to enjoy the season we are in.

It's almost the end of January and I actually feel a lot better about it than I normally do....
Usually by the end of January I feel like I have accomplished absolutely nothing. Nothing.
This month I have made some goals and lists and have actually accomplished a few things I really wanted
to. Wow.
It feels really good for a change.

What is going on in your life? How has the first month of this year been for you so far?
Tell me what you're drinking this morning and where and anything else you'd like to share so I 
can pretend I am not having my morning coffee alone! 

Happy Thursday... Just one day until Friday, y'all!


A Perfectly Beautiful Saturday In January

Monday, January 26, 2015

So you thought beautiful day in January was an oxymoron, huh? Yeah, me too.
It was fifty degrees this past Saturday and sunny and not windy and actually gorgeous for a Saturday
in January, which never really happens(unless I am inside watching the snow fall and I don't
have to leave the house).

It was the perfect day for an impromptu day trip to the Cabin.
I was so, so happy to be out of the house with my camera, in the sunshine,  wandering around ooohing and ahhhing over that light I kept finding through my lens.
My happy place/state of mind.
The kids were happy to be running around outside, jumping rope, walking throught the creek and shooting airsoft guns and bow + arrows. 
Their happy place/state of mind.

There was also lunch at a yummy local bar/restaurant that played strictly country music and had an old-school working cigarette machine, and then a couple of quick antique shop stops.
This is just my kind of day.
No schedule, sunshine, away from home for the day, kids enjoying themselves + a beautiful sunset.
This is what fills me right back up, these simple things.
I can be having a bad day or generally just a rough time and these things recharge me for sure.
I think I am ready to start the work-week now.


Hope you have a great Monday(wait- is that another oxymoron?)!

A Tiny Little Make-Over

Thursday, January 22, 2015

This little place of mine will be under construction for a few more days while I am working away on it.
And when I say work, it's really just me following a whole lot of directions that are like another language altogether to me.
And I hate directions in general, I never really follow them until I have exhausted everything else.
Honestly, I feel like punching my computer when I am trying to figure this stuff out.
Sad, but true.
So just go ahead and enjoy that sweet little pink house here that I am in love with.
I will be sitting here cussing to myself and drinking margaritas and dreaming of throwing my laptop at the wall.

My plan is to be back here bright and early Monday morning with it all finished and pretty.
Until then.

When Life Really Does Change In An Instant

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

You know that people say these things; "Life can change in an instant"... And although you cognitively know it to be true,
because it is, and you know that and so do I, you just can't really get it until something big happens in your own life
or to someone that you love, I think.

November 6 is my sister's birthday and my mom and dad's anniversary.
My sister was born on their first anniversary.
It's hard to believe that November 6  was just two months ago, when I got the call that my dad had just had a stroke.
Because it feels longer... and shorter.

When my sister called, I knew it was bad.
Then my brother called.
Should he wait for me? Drive himself? He didn't know what to do.
Bleeding on the brain.
I knew it was really bad, I just knew.
I didn't know what to do either.
Get all your stuff, turn out the lights, lock up... I had to tell myself those things.

I got the call right as I was about to leave work, right before the kids were to get out of school.
So I had to run home, meet the kids at the door and wait for a few minutes for my mother-in-law to get there.
I was near hysterics and trying desperately to hold it together.
Let it be noted here that I do not function beautifully under stress. Ehem.
I felt guilty that I wasn't able to hold it together just a little bit better for the kid's sake.
They knew I was upset, they had seriously worried looks on their faces, I felt horrible.
I also knew that there was a chance that things were going to be really bad and I also couldn't hide that from the kids though.

Between the time I initially got the call at work until I got into the emergency room, was probably about 35 minutes total.
I was sick.
All I could think of was that there was a really good chance that I might not ever see my dad again.
It may be too late by the time I get there.
What if it was too late?
Fear. There was so.much.fear.
What about all the things I never said or did?
I just wanted to be there, with my mom and dad and for everything to be okay.

In those first moments and days and weeks, I made promises to myself and to God and to anything
and anyone I could think of, to please just let him get through this.
Let us all get through this.
As the days and moments and weeks went on though, the biggest thing I told myself was that I would live my life differently though,
no matter what happened, because of all of this.
Life is short, it really is so so short.
We are not promised tomorrow.

It's time to stop putting things off, no more: I will be happy when this or that happens, when I am in a better financial situation... 
A happier place in life, a better job, a different house or city, once I finally lose the weight.
There may not be a tomorrow or next year, all we really have is now.

I have much more to say on all of this but I will leave it at that for today. 
Today my dad is doing good, he is here with us and I am so thankful for that.
When I say "when life really does change in an instant" please know that as I say that I also recognize that this may be a big change for us
with long-lasting effects but overall it had/has a good outcome. My dad is alive.
I know catastrophic things happen to people every day with very dire outcomes and they don't get the chance to say and do the things
they wanted to do, that they thought they still had time to do.
Everyone doesn't get this little nudge from Life, as a reminder of how precious every day really is.

{ Escaping the ICU and getting to see the sunset from the hospital windows and seeing that
 life goes on whether yours is standing still, or not...}


Thank you for reading.

One Super-Quick Night Away

Sunday, January 11, 2015

A couple of weeks ago we escaped for just one night away to a town less than an hour away.
I would've loved to go much, much farther... Like to another State at the very least, but we only had about 24 hours...
So another city it was.

It was just a; "Hey guys let's jump in the car and go somewhere for the night but it's gotta be close" kind of thing.
Sometimes that is totally + completely necessary for me.
If I can get out of the house and my usual surroundings just for even 24 hours, it's like a jump start, or a reboot or something for me.
I am literally less stressed, more relaxed and in a different head space within that short amount of time.
Don't you  LOVE  when you are able to do that?
I looove that.

So we ate at our favorite restaurant, Schooner's, that just happens to have the the best corn fritters ever.
Like, EVER ever.
We got some really yummy cookies at Insomnia Cookies, my favorite was the peanut butter cup cookie. Oh my God.
We were a little bummed that we were just barely out of their delivery area, but we were able to stop by the next day so it was all good.
But seriously, warm cookies delivered to your door until 3:00 am?
Hell yes.
Now why didn't I think of that?!

And there was also hotel swimming and hanging out at the bookstore... It was good.
Just what the doctor ordered.

My One Little Word + The Process Of Finding It

Monday, January 5, 2015

So I am sure you have heard all about Ali Edward's One Little Word project, right?
In the New Year errrbody's talking about it.
Errrbody. And that includes me.
If you want to read more about it you can do that here...and if you read very many blogs and
 are on Instagram too much like me you have probably heard lots of chatter on it this
 past week in particular.

People use these words to set their intention for the year; something they want to do, 
learn, not do any longer, start doing... A way in which they want to live their lives I guess.
A word gives you something to focus on, to see visually when imagining how you want your year/life to
look or how you hope to be living your life throughout the next year.

Many people use these words along with or in place of resolutions.
I don't do resolutions.
Resolutions are way too limiting for me and pretty much equals instant failure.
To me a resolution is: I will stop drinking Dr. Pepper and never have another one again for as 
long as we both shall live. That's not happening. It's just not. 
But setting goals and choosing a word or phrase is much more doable for me... 
Not instant success, don't get it twisted, but just hopefully a bit more realistic for me.
A word is more of a guide for me and a consistent reminder as to what I want to achieve and
ultimately how I want to live.

So this year I started the process of thinking about my word a bit earlier than I normally do as well as a
 bit differently than I have in the past. I looked at it more like trying to figure
 out what my word was by doing some work to get myself there. 
And let me add here -- This is not typical for me, 
which is actually kind of funny considering what my word ended up being for this year. 
Usually I wait until the right word kind of comes to me, through an aha moment, divine 
intervention or by complete accident.
This year I took to figuring it out or searching for it as more of an assignment, but a good assignment... 
Not a sucky school assignment you are dreading.
First, I wrote about what I wanted the new year to look like for me, what I knew I no longer need in my life
 or what I need less of, what I knew I need more of in my life and 
what areas of my life need the most work. It helped me a lot to write it all out.
Then I wrote down any and all words that I thought of that pertained to me.
Next,  just as an extra exercise, I looked up all of the definitions of the words I didn't immediately cross off
 of that long list and wrote them down.
After I did that and thought about each of them, I crossed out the ones I thought didn't "fit".
There were several of those.
Then I thought about it some more... Not worrying that it was December 31 or January 1 
and then January 3 and  I still wasn't sure.
It wasn't about that, it wasn't a race and it wasn't something that I only had a certain amount of
time to figure out. I've got all year to work on this if I need it.

Here's the thing. I need a lot of work. My life needs A  L O T  of work. 
I will never be there... I will always need a lot of work, I think we all do.
And I think that's a good thing.
I want to grow and learn and change this year.
Not become a completely different person, because sometimes I actually kinda like
 myself when I can get there, but grow and make changes... hopefully ones that
 will stick with me past this year alone.
So there were many possibilities because you know, this mama is a bit of a hot mess
 in the whole needing work category.  Hot, hot mess. 

:::::          a  c  t  i  o  n           :::::

That's my word.
And although part of me wishes it was a prettier word like dream or believe or 
wander or imagine or something that looks kinda cool when you write it down on
paper(that's the way my visual, creative brain works).... But it fits.
For many reasons it totally fits me right now.

I'll get a lot more into what the word action means to me in different areas of my life later this week... 
I'm still figuring it all out.
It's a new year and a new week and I am looking so forward to all of it.
I am ready to take action and start doing instead of just thinking and wishing.
Hope your new year is off to a good start! 
Do you have a word for the new year?
Something you are hoping to accomplish?

I'd love to hear! 

2014 :: The Big And Little Of It All

Friday, January 2, 2015

2  0  1  4 .

What a year it was.
Not fantastically amazing when I think about the year as a whole... 
But then there are all those hundreds of little amazing things along the way...
And when you really stop and look back at all of those little and big moments, 
You realize it was a pretty fantastic and amazing year after all, filled with ups and downs, good and bad.
And like most years, filled with lessons that maybe we didn't necessarily want to learn,
 but did anyway, and are probably better for it.


Between school happenings, Birthdays, holidays, family time, work, 
learning to play a first instrument, trips, friends, family adjustments and growing and learning so many new
 things this year, there are a few things that have left an imprint on me this year for sure.


When I pause to think about the "bigger" things that happened this year, a 
couple of things immediately come to mind.
My dad's stroke in November is undoubtedly at the top of that list.
I've thought several times since then that one day I will sit down and write a post all about that...
 but then I just can't bring myself to do it. One day though.

We had our first trip to the ER with one of the kids in May when Miss Charlotte
cracked her head open on a big rock while running outside wit her cousins in the dark.
Luckily it was just a cracked head that needed six stitches and my girl was a trooper, but wow, seeing all
 that blood and feeling so scared and helpless is a terrible feeling.
And all I could think of is all the mama's out there dealing with seriously and critically ill children.
My heart goes out to all of them so much.

I went back to work this year, like at a job outside of the home.
Part-time working, but working every day and it has definitely been an adjustment for all of us.
Lots of adjusting +  juggling... a big change for all of us, but mostly a good one.

Wyatt turned ten in October and that's still just kinda hard to believe and for this mama to deal with some days.
I look at how tall he is and how smart he is and how he just knows so much and I'm like: "What the hell?"

 { Some big and little snapshots form the year }

I am so thankful for this past year, for all of the big and little moments.
I am thankful for all of the hard stuff... and the good stuff, too.
I'm thankful for these two little people I get to try and raise every day.
I'm thankful for my family and for friendships and for all that I have learned this year.
Thank you for everything, 2014. 

I am ready to put this past year behind me and looking so forward to a fresh start in the year ahead.
I know it's really just the turn of the calendar page in some ways, but it has significant meaning to me.
A new beginning. A restart that I so very much need. I am so very thankful for that.


Here's to 2015 and all that it may bring.